firstly, i'd like to apologise to fiona. this is gonna sound quite insulting to you.

i just read fiona's blog.
yeah i know all i did was buy qr popeye's.
yes.
i know its just popeye's.
but hey, she likes it.
let her be happy.
and yes, i know its not much.
but we all have to live within our means.
to me, thats much less.
i know to you its not much.
but my friends said that they felt thier wallets burn up when i paid.
mock me if you will, but thats the kinda background i come from.
i aint exactly rich compared to most other ppl in our course.
i used to walk home from punggol to hougang just because my ez link card was empty.
and i used to walk half an hour home at 10pm just to save 45 cents.
im not exactly rich.
i know im not.
but among my friends im actually comparatively well off.
at least my mum's got a job, even if the income isn't regular and the operating costs are sky high.
my friend zen.
his dad died a while back this year.
his mum isn't working.
his family is bigger than mine.
no offense, zen.
we aint rich dudes.
im sorry, alexis.
but i can tell you for sure that i cant pay my way into your heart.
or make you feel like my princess.
im really sorry, but this is me.
perpetually broke.
and if any1 really wants to know,
i dont know where the fuck my bastard father is.
the son of a bitch owes us BIG.
i'd shank him first chance i get.
wussyboy ran off somewhere overseas, probably malaysia.
as soon as he enters singapore he's fucked.
my mum has a writ of law to hold him warrant for his cpf cash when he next enters singapore.
when he next enters singapore, he's basically fucked.
my mum's gonna sue him for every cent possible, including interest.
thats for all the 10 years of child maintennance fees he owes us.
me and my sis.
if i manage to get it in time then maybe i'll go to university.
yes, maybe.
life isn't easy.
and yes, i'll probably always look the same, more or less.
its always a ratty pair of jeans, chucks and a t shirt THAT COSTS LESS THAN 20 BUCKS, k?
money talks. bs walks.
so im gonna SHUT UP and c walk my way through life, K?

I just opened the newest korn album.
i know its a little late.
i got it for my birthday actually.
but i only just got the time to listen to it now.
its quite nice, actually.



This is the main cover of the album. its entitled See You On The Other Side, btw.



the album itself comes with a hard plastic sleeve. this is the album without the plastic sleeve.



and this is thee plastic sleeve itself.
its kinda cool how they printed the little boy on the sleeve instaed of the album.



this is the back cover of the album. nope, the track listing isn't there.



this is the inside of the album. yeps. its a double disc album. the left side is the main section of the album. the other disc is the bonus disc, with remixes and live vids and such.



and this is the inside front cover. yep. its a pop-up. kinda amusing. lols.



and this is the track list. its below the inside front cover. it kinda looks like a death note, or maybe a tombstone. lols.

i love this album. i haven't really listened to it much so far, but its mostly awesome.

the internet is officially fucked up.
i cant touch anything on limewire.
all downloads appear to be zero kb/s.
i hate this.
and adium keeps disconnecting me every like... 10 mins?
and sometimes i cant even connect lor...
thats major fucked.
loading any pages takes an eternity.
when i tried to wiki some stuff for my essay, it took forever lor...
fucking taiwanese earthquake.
the taiwanese are literally no gd almost everywhere.
politically, they have election rallies so flamboyant that they resemble getai lor...
and every once in a while they find the need to brawl and hurl shit at each other in parliament.
whatever happened to looking dignified.
and also, they keep churning out talentless pop stars that dress and sound exactly like each other.
granted, i cant do better.
but why dont the taiwanese get sick of seeing and hearing the same damn thing all the time.
have they ever thought of trying something new?
every singer they put out sounds so pop-py lor...
why dont they try out something different, even if its just for the novelty value?
and lyrically they all feature the same few themes lor...
they're all about love.
yeah, its great.
but not all the time lor...
have they ever thought about singing on something more important?
like thier FUCKED UP UNDERSEA EARTHQUAKE, for example?
i know its pissing them off as much as me, and its nt thier fault.
but i still HATE IT.

i've a really bad feeling about this.
something's going on.
what is it?
can it really be?
is history going to repeat itself again?
is my heart going to be dashed to pieces again?
i sincerely hope not.
we've only been together for a while so far.
is it going to end this soon?
i don't want this to end.
ever.
these are my dreams.
which i've never lived before.
is love only for some?
am i destined to live alone?
everytime you stop smiling my heart just stops.
i cant stop loving you.
and im afraid to lose you.
what if u really dump me?
what if eventually i end up alone in the dark again?
you mean so much to me...
i don't ever want to let you go...
don't stop loving me.
ever.

its fucking cold now.
and i hate the rain.
it gives me horrible problems.
it wets my socks.
it gives me headaches.
it makes my knee hurt.
it makes me tired all the time.
and it coops me up at home sometimes.

AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
fuck the world, for all its worth.
Every inch of planet Earth.
this life is kinda shitty sometimes.
i like november's rain.
its so sweet and soft...
ever heard the story about the gnr concert?
as they started playing the song november rain. it started drizzling ever so softly and sweetly.
it was in november, btw.
then, the rain stopped just as soon as the song ended.
freaky, huh?
i dun rmb exactly which concert it is.
cant be bothered to dig.
BUT...
i HATE december.
its just wet, dank and dreary.
rain can be beautiful...
but never in december, apparently.
how fitting for most, actually.
christian haters will love it when those christmas lights short out and fry a few jesus freaks.
LOL
anyway... i dont think ppl have a right to be so happy on christmas when there are others having shitty christmases.
for the record, this is the first christmas i haven't spent single.
lol
usually... when i saw all those couples happy i'd hate them and want to fucking die...
and fuck. i'm late again.
for death note 2.
lol
oh yeah...
L IS GONA FUCKING DIE!
WHOO!!!!!!!!
die, bitch, DIE!!!
lol

i know i dont usually do this...
but...
here are some song lyrics...
its a ballad-ish type song by power metal band dragonforce.
the melodies are hauntingly saddening.
its the perfect thing to cry to.
if any1 is feeling down gimme a hit and i'll send u this.
and this song iis... beautiful.
it'll be just the song for me to listen to if i turn out to be a mistake in life again...

alexis! i love you! don't ever let me go. please?

In the darkness of the night in the shadows of the dawn
It's turning black no looking back the sands of time are sown
When the day will slowly end and the sun has turned to grey
Will we feel the power of freedom with the dawn of a new day?

Over mountains paved with gold to the valleys of the slain
Our quest will lead us onwards to the journey of the brave
When the time has come to stand for the power we believe
We will ring the sound of victory for one and all to see

Sometimes in your darkest dreams you will feel the haunting prayer
Silent tears of your hidden fears come to haunt you once again
Fight on for the memories of the everlasting dreams
Their pain in the silent lands on wings of glory free
We can go on forever with the darkness so far away
And the warriors who live forever fight on to the end

Across the highest mountains and through the endless seas
Our journey ever onwards fight until we all be free
Through the darkness shining the neverending light
On through the days of glory rise towards the fight

And one day we will find a way towards this distant golden age
The cries of war will sound the day
We stand before the dawn of a new world

On through the raging thunder across the seven seas
Cold winter skies are falling on the battles we have seen

We can go on forever with the darkness so far away
And the warriors who live forever fight on to the end

Across the highest mountains and through the endless seas
Our journey ever onwards fight until we all...
Across the highest mountains and through the endless seas
Our journey ever onwards fight until we all be free
Through the darkness shining the neverending light
On through the days of glory rise towards the fight

And one day we will find a way towards this distant golden age
The cries of war will sound the day
We stand before the dawn of a new world
We stand before the dawn of a new world...

src="http://www.bbspot.com/Images/News_Features/2004/04/scammer/larry_koffi.jpg" width="300" height="90"
border="0" alt="You are Larry Koffi. You are director in charge auditing and collecting Union Togolaise De Banque Lome, Togo West Africa. You came across $44.5 million of a dead person in your bank. You will give me 25% to be his NEXT OF KIN. You like red jelly beans.">
Which Nigerian spammer are You?

LOL.
i dunno WHO THE FUCK is he.
meh.
apparently qr is mrs. estrada.
well, at least jose estrada is charismatic (kinda)

merry christmas every1.
i hope ur christmases are just peachy.
unfortunately it usually isn't.
what does christmas mean?
for some, christmas is a time to have fun with friends.
for some, christmas is a time to commemorate the birth of jesus christ.
(it isn't even the date of his birth, btw. its actually a greco-roman festival, i believe.)
for me,
christmas is a time to think.
to reflect on those around you and to think about how much they mean to you.
all in all,
my life hasn't exactly been the happiest one ever.
but there are so many people living worse off lives than me, innit?
i should be content with my lot in life.
esp. when there are so many people around the world living a hard christmas.
i know this sounds stupid.
but think of the people living lousy christmases.
think of the homeless.
think of the poor.
think of how they feel when they see every1 spending cash like water just to be happy for a day, when the money could have been better spent providing them with basic needs like food.
there is a problem with the global system, actually.
this unequal globalisation is ruining the lesser developed countries.
the rich countries exploit the poor and rob them of raw materials like diamonds for a pittance.
they force the poor in third world countries to do back breaking work in often dangerous or unpleasant conditions.
they exploit their circumstances and build endless rows of factories belching out clouds of heavy fumes as far as the eye can see.
this is how the world is becoming, eh?
also, i am sick of people telling me what to think and what to do.
you can go ahead and tell me, but i have the basic human right to choose whether or not to follow, you fucking fascist.
and i'm sick of you always insisting on having things done your way at your timing.
its always NOW NOW NOW.
fuck off you fascist bitch.
you're not telling me what i like.
or what i want.
or what to think.
sieg heil, eh?
YOU FUCKING NAZI WHORE.
its my life.
i think i have the basic choice to choose what to think, dont i?
and no,
i wont be held in line by your rhetoric.
i wont be held in line by your archaic moral values.
authority MUST be held in check.
if there are no checks on power then are we no more than fascists?
this is a fucking family, not a fascist state.
i see no reason why i should think the way you want me to be.
i don't believe that you are superior in every way just because you're older.
i can name off hand several ways in which i'm your superior.
so fuck off, dear mum.
this is my life.
its fucking bollocks to have to say this,
but i'm no longer your sweet little boy i was 10 over years ago.
i have my own mind now.

Fire fire burning bright.
Guiding the hunter through the night.
Will you steal my soul today?
Or will you steal my soul tonight?

its so depressing.
i just woke up.
dreamt that alexis is back.
woke up with tears streaming down my face.
at least the rain has stopped.
it was raining like hell last night.
it was so cold.
i hope alexis was cuddled up in some nice warm hotel room, nt trapped in the torrential rainstorm.
ahh....
now i'm starting 2 sound like a mum.
LOL
i really miss her, btw.
she'll be back... tml?
i've no idea.
around today or tml.
i'll call her the moment she gets back.

i hate the weather.
its so cold and wet and miserable.
its especially cold without those warm hugs from my Alexis.
i SERIOUSLY miss her.
she's like the light of my life or something.
life's kinda boring without her.
i've gt nth betta 2 do more or less.
my phone is disturbingly quiet.
i miss playing sms tennis with her.
i miss the feel of her fingers entwined with mine.
i miss the sweet smell of her hair.
i miss the taste of her skin.
i miss the sound of her voice.
i miss her loving smiles.
ONLY A FEW MORE DAYS!
HANG IN THERE, MUNKY!

ok...
went to bboy just now.
realised that i suck. bleah.

MOVES I TOTALLY OWN.
1-step.
6-step.
elbow plant.
baby freeze.
worm.

MOVES I CAN DO DECENTLY
3-step.
turtle freeze.
handglide freeze.
air baby.
tailgrab.
shoulder freeze.

MOVES I'M LEARNING.
kip-ups.
4-step.
5-step.
7-step.
12-step.
TOPROCKS (believe it or not. yeah. i've found doper ones.)

anyway... i'm nt really that decent anyway.
i kinda suck.
life is major depressing now.
its pouring like nv b4, i'm fucking FREEZING...
AND I STILL MISS ALEXIS!
someone. anyone.
KILL ME NOW!

its fucking cold...
my balls are literally freezing now...
i hate the cold.
it makes me act out of character.
last night i actually slept with a singlet on.
i haven't don e that in... a year?
and i'm SERIOUSLY missing Alexis AGAIN lor...
life kinda sucks now...
no alexis.
nothing to do.
no reason to even wake up.
BLEAH.

can any1 lend me $591.30?
thats the amount that'll take 2 fedex me 2 thailand, so i can be with alexis.
pls?

bollocks...
i'm still missing my Alexis.
this sucks balls.
chef's proverbial chocolate salty balls.
i'm nt even sure when she'll be back.
she said either the 20th or the 21st.
but im nt sure exactly when.
i dont know if i can even be with her the day she gets back.
i've gt radio to do on the 21st and 22nd and eboy's birthday to celebrate somewhere around there too...
and even if she's back i should give her some time to rest.
she'd be damn tired after she's back.
so all in all i wont be seeing much of her until this coming saturday.
i'm SO gonna rot and die.
i honestly feel like crying now.
its official.
Emowyn is returning.
life doesnt seem as meaningful without her.
south park isn't as funny.
diet is meaningless.
i just ate rice and chili sauce
and the chili doesnt even seem as spicy without her.
LOL
so in the end i like.. threw away half the fucking bowl.
do me gd though.
im FAT.
mr lardbucket whale.
i shld go bulimic.
LOL
jkjk....
healthy weight loss doesnt involve puking urself.
it involves getting up and 7 am on sundays and running, as well as only eating 1 tiny meal a day.
haha...
btw... i noticed that almost no1 reads my blog except 4 my "captive audience" (Alexis)
LOL
who gives a fuck.
so long as i get to blow off some steam its fine for me.
i originally started this as an outlet for my emo-ing and pissed-offness.
LOL

i'm still missing my alexis.
i hope she's having a real good time in thailand...
she should be...
i'd be having a great time if i was on holiday too...
anyway...
i got a haircut...
it looks... neater.
BY FAR.
lol...
i'm wondering if i should colour it.
was thinking of either DARK purple or brown...
will post up a pic of it if i can get a decent looking 1...

ok thats it.
Alexis flew off this morning.
for thailand.
i'm SO gonna miss her when she's gone.
she promised nt 2 but me the stuff i wanted.
haha...
who's blaming her?
i asked her 2 buy me a few knives and some more boxers.
i wonder how'd she explain 2 her parents y she was buying knives and boxers.
LOL
i'll be missing her lots...
*cries*

i'm FUCKING tired.
yesterday...
went to the gym...
cheong 1 hour liddat...
then went to bugis nlb to meet my personal darling angel...
were supposed to do my outlines...
did them. i'm a gd student.
haha...
after that sent my kinky gal home...
then we went to some void deck. we were SUPPOSED to do my radio.
but then we ended up digressing lah...
haha... her fault. she's so distracting....
so we ended up digressing...
as usual...
and she's gonna fly off in like... 2 days lor!
i'm SO gonna miss her...
i'll spend the whole of tml with her...
since its gonna be my last day with her b4 she flies off...
and i cant even send her off tml...
haiz...
nvm lah...
even if i do i'd probably end up crying like a retarded baby...
so pai seh...
lols...
and sunday i'm gonna get a haircut to surprise her!
i'm probably gonna look VERY different.
buzzcut? XP
seriously.
i want suggestions for a haircut.
any1?

haha...
had quite a nice day today...
happy day....
more or less...
went to watch cinderella with QR today, after her classes...
the plot is nt bad...
but the plot tools are stale.
the part where the head turns eerily on the corpse?
the exorcist.
the part where the gal slices up her face with a mirror?
silence of the lambs.
meh.
i could think and go on, but its a waste of time...
anyway...
after the movie we went to walk around aimlessly at the heereen...
then we walked all the way down to far east (still aimlessly)...
then alexis felt tired...
so we just sat down on a bench and TRIED TO DECIDE WHERE TO GO.
after a while;....
we were trying 2 decide where 2 eat...
but we din feel hungry.
yes.
alexis wasn't hungry.
for once.
so couldn't decide.
all of a sudden, alexis decided to MAKE ME GO HOME AND DO HMWK.
zzz
lols...
but i wanted to spend more time with her...
so i decided to DRAG her to mcd to eat...
lols...
after that i sent her home...
i think alexis rocks my world!

I’m sick of every1 trying the best to live their lives happy.
I only live for one thing.
The rest of my life is NOT happy…
Hearing u guys talk like you’re so fucking despo to get a fling.
Fuck that.
That kinda shit will make you happy?
That’s trippin.
I’ve only got 1 thing to say about this shit.
FUCK. HAPPY.

Alexis is flying off soon...
she's going to Thailand for a week...
to shop like crazy...
of course, i'm asking her to buy me stuff...
whatever she likes...
so i gave her my sizes and everything...

Anyway... i'm gonna miss her like crazy...
haha...
maybe when she comes back i'll give her a surprise...
maybe i'll carve QR into my skin somewhere...
(CANNOT! U PROMISED U WONT DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT!)
or maybe i'll...
carve a (OW! SHE JUST BIT ME!) heart into my shoulder...
haha...
we'll c how i feel, k?
(CANNOT. YOU PROMISED ME YOU WONT ALREADY. MUST KEEP THE PROMISE)
aww.... now she's smiling at me like dunno wat again...
just.. like... that...
all of a sudden i think she'a especially cute...
most of the time i just find her very cute.
now its very VERY cute...
haha...
i'm SO gonna miss her...
now i'm busy spoiling her image...
her hand is on my thigh again...
lols...
i just love the sweet smell of her skin...
the brush of her hair on my fingers...
and the way she smiles at me...
everytime she smiles my heart just melts...
everytime i kiss her its like arriving on another world...
just makes me want to
*CENSORED, CENSORED AND DEFINITELY CENSORED!*
lols...
i really love her...
especially the cute way she smiles at me...
and the way she...
nvm..
shall keep my blog nc16, nt r21...
haha....
(AHHHH I DIDNT DO ANYTHING THAT'S R21 OKAY!)
lols... nt YET? or?
haha...
i'm REALLY gonna miss her...

yes. my neck is fucked up.
apparently i strained my right neck muscle.
its now kinda... swollen? cramped?
yeps. now i cant really turn to the right much.
find it harder 2 kiss alexis now.
LOLS
nvm...
where there's a will, there's a way.
haha...
anyway...
i was teaching eboy/erin how to do a rollback elbow plant.
and i rested slightly on the side of my head, instead of the FLAT top of my head.
and strained the neck muscle.
but my mum rubbed it with this really cooling oil...
so its nt as bad now...
i'll have to rub again every once in a while though...
ALEXIS!
help me rub, k?
then you can help me rub something else too... haha...
lols...
maybe i'll think up some OBSCENE ground rules...
like...
thou shalt suck my kiss at least once a day?
haha... jkjk...
nt gonna happen, k?

This is dedicated to my personal angel.
I’ll still love you even if you regret this. I’ll love you from 6 feet under.



As the blade sinks in, carving your name into my shoulders,
I feel the warmth of your love searing into my soul.
You’ve got my heart in your hands.
Its your to keep.
I’ll gladly be locked up in your heart shaped box for weeks.

If an ounce of pain could show you how much I love you I’ll bleed my life away.
After all, what is it worth?
Nothing.
We all die in the end.
Let me bleed for you.
To show you how much you mean to me.

My soul just melts when I peer into your angel’s eyes.
Your beautiful eyes.
What can be more beautiful?
Except your heart?

When you break my soul,
We’re going straight to hell.
You’re going straight to hell, boy.
You’re going straight to hell.
Everything is gonna burn
We’ll all take turns
I’ll get mine, too
This munky's going to heaven.

ok... im being made to blog again.
i'm really happy today...
firstly... i've got sum1 special wimme...
hehe...
i've found the legs to my table...
the 1 who will support me and pick me up when im down...
the cure for the itch...
the one to hold my heart when it is down.
the 1 to die with me, hopefully.
ALEXIS! LETS KILL OURSELVES NOW!
(alexis says NO, DUN BE SILLY)
i'm a silly boy. im silly enough to catch the bus, if it means always being with you.

secondly, i got 19.5/20 for my grammar test.
i was SERIOUSLY expecting 2 fail.
surprisingl, i got 19.5 instead.
haha. so did alexis, btw.
anyway... IM SMART. XP

HELLO!
sel's playing sewer run now.
seems fun, but he's lousy.
keeps dying. =S
YOU NEED TO TRAIN HARDER!

hehe. i've gt betta stuff 2 do than train on some game... lols

ya right. u've been playing it like.. 24/7 and ignoring all of us. =(

lols... okok... i'll stop playing now and pay more attention 2 u, k?
bb... im gg 2 pay attenion 2 her liao!
ok... she's forcing me to type more now.... lols...
i dunno wad 2 type. lols.
erm....
i owe u guys drinks.
yes. now i do.
thats becos...
my heart has been touched by an angel.. XP

i'll sum up how i feel now in a few songs.

1) scars, by papa roach
2) suicide solution, by ozzy osbourne
3) Munky gone to heaven, by the pixies

HELLO! alexis here.
HAHA. selwyn wants to cut his hair!
cuz he just found out that he got dandruff today.
so i see no point in him growing long hair, don't you think?
short hair's better! short hair rocks!
=)
should wait till he has no more dandruff then leave it to grow longer, right?
sel's frenz, please agree wimme!

...
it'll be fine after washing more.
my day is fucked up.
first, i lost my ez link card.
2nd, im, putting on weight.
alexis is POKING my fats now.
3rd, i found out im getting dandruff. need to chANGE shampoos.
(alexis says: USE HEAD&SHOULDERS! lol..)
shoulders i can get myself. y dun u gimme head?
anyway... sometimes i wish i could curl into a fetal ball and hide at home.
im gonna wither up and die soon though...
an angel is flying away... XP
(alexis: *cough*bullshit*cough*)

haiz...
life is fucked up these few days...
had a nice chat wif my head facilitator patrick yesterday.
his main message?
was more or less...
dun be so fucking lazy.
and dun fucking give that attitude in class.
besides that...
i woke up late this morning.
classes at 8.
supposed 2 wake up at 5 30.
but woke up at 9 instead.
i hate this.
and now i'm in cats.
i hate school.
maybe i'll try going through school totally ignoring every1 for a whole day.
1 whole day.
no smiles.
no contact.
just between me and myself.
yeah, i'd like that.
i'll try it one day...
maybe on thursday?

haha...
im just back from my scout troop's annual camp.
i STINK.
seriously.
and i only slept 2 hours at night.
but i... ate snakes during the day...
i skipped morning inspection and fell asleep in the bunk.
anyway... im seriously fucking tired...
and my mum just fucking turned off the internet...
now i cant finish downloading the hentai i was planning to put in my ipod...
now i'll have to fall asleep in the bus instead...
i'm seriously pissed off now...
it wont really take much to set me off now...
i hope i'll turn emo instead...
its safer.
i dun wanna end up bitch slapping some1.
unless that person REALLY deserves it.
thats it. i'll turn emo.
i hate this.
sum1 just PLEASE fucking kill me already?