i randomly started listening to nine inch nails.

"i looked into the eye of the beast, and what i saw was beautiful."
-John Locke (the LOST character, not the philosopher. Shame on me)

anyway, this is Hurt, By Nine Inch Nails.
Trent Reznor is a genius.
listen to it, k?
its a beautiful keyboard ballad.

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end

You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

(HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAN FEN!)

I saw this from bruce, so i decided to do it.

#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?

cry like fuck.
or plot to kill them.
or myself.
depends, really.

#2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?

metal god. play at wacken open air.
open for iron maiden.
or amon amarth.
or any other godlike band.

#3. What will your dream wedding be like?

black.
all the lights off.
torches.
me in a black hood, like an executioner.
instead of champagne i'd drink a goblet of blood.
corpsepaint too.
and instead of 2 ppl lighting a single candle (like my auntie and uncle did)
we'd both slit our arms and bleed into a goblet.
then we'd drink it.
and black metal would play in the background, of course.

#4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?

nope. the less i think the better it is for me.

#5. What’s your ideal lover like?

good question.
not gonna give an answer.
too sensistive a qn, in a way.

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?

either way its incomplete.
i'd say its both or neither.
preferably both, but i'd do fine with neither.

#7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?

not wasting time.
even though i've too much of that anyway.
don't really think i should lie to myself.

#8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?

guess there'd be nothing i could do, innit?
i'd probably go for a smoke.
helps clear my mind

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?

err... yeah.
work, actually.

#10.Who makes your day?

amon amarth, currently.

#11. What do you feel right now while doing this?

my neck hurts.
i just strained it.
and its 3 30 and i havent bathed.
i really should, eh?

#12. How do you see yourself in ten years time?

fat.
hairy.
stuck in a dead end job.

#13. Who are currently the most important people to you?

myself.
no really.
if i'm not the most important in my life i wouldnt be most important anywhere, no?

#14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

i'll leave this out, since no1 rly tagged me.

#15. Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?

single and rich.
because money wont dump me.

#16. What is the first thing you do every morning?

turn on some music.
serious.
last thing i do b4 i sleep too.

#17. Would you give all in a relationship?

never say never.
and never say forever.

#18. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?

the 1 i have more chance with.
trust me.
been there.

#19. What type of friends do you like?

william.
dependable,
helpful.
common interests.
not judgemental.
funny.

#20. What type of friends do you dislike?

Politically correct people.
judgemental.
waitwait.
then they wouldnt even be my friends in the 1st place, no?

The pursuit of vikings- Amon Amarth.

The warming sun returns again
And melts away the snow
The sea is freed from icy chains
Winter is letting go

you know what?
the president is just a largely ceremonial position.
he doesnt do much work other than be the "ambassador" of singapore to the world.
and slip in a boringly politically correct statement once in a while.
so anyway,



technically if america made mustaine president there wouldn't be too much diff.
bush's only leader in name anyway.
and mustaine would make a much better "ambassador" for america.
:)

Peace Sells- Megadeth
What do you mean, I couldnt be president, of the united states of america?
Tell me something, its still we the people, right?

you know what?
i'm gonna say something i never thought i'd ever say.
i've been listening to pop.
i actually like it.

nope, i'm not crazy.
seriously, i never thought SOME 80's pop could be good.
but it actually IS decent.
stuff like billy idol.
journey.
asia.
europe.

nope. there isn't a band called africa tho.
as far as i know.

i am OFFICIALLY out of touch with my contemporaries.

it isn't THAT bad.
its quite enjoyable.
anyway...
gig time now.

going to the music garage to watch some bands play.
some -core bands and maybe 1 or 2 real metal bands.
oshiego's playing tho.
so its gonna be great watching THEM, at least.

anyway...
i hate how my mum keeps whining on about how unkempt i am.
she keeps whining on how i need to shave and cut my hair.
yes, i know.
EVERY1 tells me that same thing.
why cant EVERY1 get the message that i'll shave and cut my hair WHEN I FEEL LIKE IT.

Rebel Yell- Billy Idol.

I'd sell my soul for you babe
For money to burn with you
I'd give you all, and have none, babe
Just, just, justa, justa to have you here by me

you know what happened?
i'm supposed to send in poster designs promoting the label as part of my attachment.
or more accurately, me and yi song are supposed to.
but he's a cunt who never does any work, so i do everything.
and have made it clear to my lecturer in charge (lionel)

anyway, poster designs.
yeah.
so 3 of my poster designs got rejected.
i'll URL them, because putting them here just fucks up my layout.
i should change it.
will do so when i'm free.

so here they are.
Mas Selamat
Black Metal
Free Sex

FYI the 1st 1 is already a reworking of a poster that was originally rejected IN THE FIRST PLACE, OSTENSIBLY for a different reason.

the 2nd 1 is part of a series tagged- the label: home of <>
well apparently black metal isnt as much of a music genre as hip hop or alt rock.

the free sex 1 is a parody of our old ad asking for a designer.
it said THIS AD SUCKS in bold and the subtype asked for a new designer.

so this conclusively proves that CLOSE MINDED CHRISTIAN FUCKS have ZERO SENSE OF HUMOUR, nor do they understand the concepts of EQUALITY or TOLERANCE.

seriously, christians should learn to get their head out of their asses.
its bad enough that i have to hold my nose and work with christians, but i also have to work UNDER a christians.

im not intolerant, UNLIKE THEM.
hold my nose and work with them, fine.
but apparently they can bring their EGOISTIC, HOLIER THAN THOU ATTITUDES and CLOSE MINDED MORAL STANDARDS into the workplace.
while i cant even BREATHE about their OBVIOUS HYPOCRISY, BIASED JUDGEMENT and CLOSE MINDEDNESS.

they dont seem to understand that THE CHRISTIAN-CENTRIC VIEW OF THE WORLD IS NOT UNIVERSAL, or that WHAT IS NOT CHRISTIAN ISN'T NECESSARILY ANTI-CHRISTIAN.

if any1 knows CLOSE MINDED CHRISTIAN CUNTS, kindly feel free to redirect them to this set of arguments.

is it inherent that christians are AFRAID of everything secular?
there have been christian moral outrages over EVERYTHING that is at least partly secular.
fear.
fear is weakness.

what happens to the souls of babies that die?
due to original sin they should go to hell, innit?
but if they're forgiven, then why is it said that belief in jesus is 1 of the requirements to go to heaven?

what happens to people who die but have never heard of jesus?
no matter how morally righteous they are wont they still go to hell?
well thats hardly fair, innit?

so this is christianity.
well if this is the kind of god they worship then leave me out of it.
they preach kindness, tolerance and love.
i have NEVER seen a SINGLE CHRISTIAN who PRACTICES WHAT HE PREACHES.

notice how everytime i tell people about my interests,
non christians give me polite remarks.
CHRISTIANS give me SMUG SUPERIOR SMILES CONDESCENDING LOOKS and best of all, LOOKS OF FEAR.

how can we trust people who preach peace, yet prays to a god that SLAUGHTERED EVERY FIRST BORN SON OF EGYPT.
how can we trust the followers of a god that LED HIS PEOPLE AROUND LIKE MONKEYS FOR 40 YEARS because 1 GUY GOT PISSED OFF.
forgiveness and peace indeed, eh?

this is christianity, i suppose.
feel free to leave me out of it.
for 'tis better to rule in hell than it is to serve in heaven.

Fight (To stop the tyranny)- Assassin

Go wild you banging crowd
Destroy there rules of tyranny
What we will say about life, when we are living free

i'm in the mood for some funny shit now.
so here it goes.

Yellowcard Wall of death.

Lostprophets getting Bottled.

yep.
pussy bands should stick to some pussy shit.
otherwise they'll just look pathetic.
seriously.
2 walls of people slamming into each other from 2-3m away.
doesnt hurt.

wall of death from 10+m away?
not exactly metal, but would still hurt as fuck.
especially if the opposite side looks like they cloned amon amarth 123456 times.

The Skull Beneath The Skin- Megadeth

And as we fold your arms
To make the holy cross
We cross the crucifix
Religion has been lost
The skull beneath the skin

BloodyXXXGallery
i kinda like this website.
i think its artistic.
go take a look.

and just because its funny,

I Gotta Pee- NOFX
1, 2, 1-2-3!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
i gotta pee!
call 911!

i'm in a very doomy, depressed mood now.
the kinda mood that makes me wanna slit my throat and light black candles and stuff.
i dunno why.
i guess im just in 1 of those moods.

this kinda mood makes me feel very alone, as well as making me WANT to be alone.
cold.
grim.

sometimes i just feel like ive got lotsa crap to say.
but i dont know exactly what to say anymore.
or who to say it to anymore.
its like screaming at a wall sometimes.

i listen to a ton of music.
and sometimes it seems like thats all thats important anymore.
what else is there to hold dear?
everything else is just... temporal.

any1 watches lost?
rmb the episode not to long ago?
the constant?
desmond's consciousness kept snapping back between 2 times.
so he had to find a constant of sorts to position himself temporally, otherwise his consciousness would just... not return to his body.
where's my constant, in a way?

cold, dark grim feelings.
its like everything in life's an illusion sometimes.
just a false reward.
a moment of personal glory sandwiched between eternities of reality.

i have not yet completed the race, though it seems like i have.
the finishing line is not in sight, no blue riband awaits me.
all i see is the dust of my contemporaries choking me.
i lie here, nose to the ground.
will i ever get up and back in the race?
or cannot the kingdom of salvation take me home?

i wonder how life would be like if i made a few minor changes.
ever heard of the butterfly effect?
a butterfly flapping its wings on 1 side of the globe may cause a hurricane on the other side.
time... is like that.
what would my life be like if i, for example, lived in a house 1 down the road instead?
drastically different, actually.
i wouldnt have had been able to get into my primary school.
see my point?

i remember reading about this fictional life simulation game.
to inspire the test subjects into developing space flight, the player parted the clouds to reveal the splendour of the night sky.
just 1 clear night.
if only i could do that with life.
sit in on life as an observer.
once in a while i could part the metaphorical clouds on life.
i wish i could do that with mine and see what happens, no?

To Live Is To Die- Metallica
When a Man Lies He Murders
Some Part of the World
These Are the Pale Deaths Which
Men Miscall Their Lives
All this I Cannot Bear
to Witness Any Longer
Cannot the Kingdom of Salvation take Me Home?

Solitude- Candlemass
Earth to earth
Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust

this is fucking bullshit.
today was fucking unlucky.
i woke up VERY late,
didnt have enough cash.
forgot to put on my hairband.
forgot to bring my cigs.
and i just lost my phone.

fuck lah. now my whole com's fucking lagging up.

i suppose this is what karma really is.
you try your best to be nice to people and such.
yes, i have been a good boy like that.
was considering giving free (or cost price) english tuition.
no choice now, need to buy a new phone.
sorry cynthia lol.

so see.
i think life works this way.
you be nice to people and you get unlucky.
innit?

gimme a while to vent, k?
im pissed and some guy on a forum happened to post this up.
so again, i shall rant about christianity.

Click to read this christian crap. its rather entertaining.

anyway, this is an article full of bullshit quoted out of context and without fully understanding the intent of the ones quoted.
explore the website.
take a look.

and now look at this part.
CLICK HERE!

apparently now...
emo is goth.
punk is goth
thrash is goth
grunge is goth
heavy metal is goth
Marilyn Manson is goth
Smashing pumpkins is goth
van halen is goth
AC/DC is goth
Ozzy Osbourne is goth
Emperor is goth
Varg Vikernes is Goth
Varg Vikernes is NAZI GOTH (ooh.. scary!)
Bard Faust changed his name to BART (the simpsons... *cue theme music*)
Black Metal is goth
Slayer is goth
Silverchair is goth
Varg Vikernes was actually convicted for church burning as well.

christians.
*shakes head*
never get their facts tight.

oh and btw on the same page about goths?
see those gal pics?
i actually think they're hot.
and i want skin like that too.

anyway...
lookie here.
http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Evils%20in%20America/Rock-n-Roll/elvis_or_evils.htm
elvis is an anagram for evils.
lol.
i never noticed that.

wait, you know what else?
god is an anagram of dog!
imagine a christian praying in church...
then he hears woofing from heaven.
wow.
ridiculous?
thats the church.

i'd like to end off with a few quotes.

"i like your christ. i hate your christians."
"the only good christian died 2000 years ago."

fuck. guess what i found with william last night.



its been around for a while, but we saw it on offer and nearly creamed our jeans.
original price- 20 bucks.
sale price- 6 bucks.
WTF!

seriously, people are stupid for not buying it.
and so i went to mcfarlane's website.(CLICK!)
and its fucking awesome.
i found THESE!

slash, 1 of the greatest axemen of all time.


every1's favourite prince of darkness, OZZY!

A little bit of kiss here (animalize! lol)
this is Mr. Paul Stanley.

and the devil himself, Mr. Gene Simmons!

Mr Angus Young doing the duck walk!


its eddie ('ed the head), mascot of iron maiden!




Mr ALICE COOPER!


ok first, i have to say something.
HEATHER and HAN FEN!
if you're reading this, go take a look at their website.
trust me.

and i finally found my sabbath patch.
couldnt find my helloween patch anywhere, so i just settled for a liittle pumpkin.
and i found my china flag patch.
i'll cut it up and sew it on upside down.

promises- megadeth
I will meet you in the next life, I promise you
Where we can be together, I promise you
I will wait till then in heaven, I promise you
I promise, I promise

guess what i just thought of.




looks alike, no?
1 is the japanese baby sotong lah.
the other is supposed to be a dead baby.
looks rather appetising now, no?
you know what else it looks like?
SIM chicken cutlets.
with the reddish sauce on it.
:)

Seek and Destroy- Metallica

Scanning the scene
in the city tonight
We're looking for you
to start up a fight
There's an evil feeling
in our brains
But it's nothing new
you know it drives us insane

i decided to write up a list, so here it is.

great opening lines in music.

Freebird- Lynyrd Skynyrd.
"If i leave here tomorrow. Would you still remember me?"

Welcome to the jungle- Guns & Roses.
"You know where the fuck you are? You're in the jungle baby!"

Die for the government- Anti-Flag
"You've gotta die gotta die gotta die for your government. die for your country? that's shit."

Iron Man- Black Sabbath
"I. AM. IRON. MAN!"

Heaven and Hell- Black Sabbath
"Sing me a song, you're a singer. Do me a wrong, you're a bringer of evil."

War- Burzum
"this is HUH! WAR!"

Black Sabbath- Black Sabbath
"what is this that stands before me? Figure in black that points at me."

Paranoid- Black Sabbath
"Finished with my woman 'cause she couldn't help me with my mind
people think I'm insane because I am frowning all the time"

Fear Of The Dark- Iron Maiden
"I am a man who walks alone
And when I'm walking a dark road
At night or strolling through the park"

Where Dragons Rule- Dragonforce
"Full the moon and midnight sky
Through the dark they ride
Warriors of forever will sacrifice the right"

Attitude- The Misfits
"attitude! you've got some fuckin' attitude.
i don't believe what you're saying to me.
you've got some attitude."

Purple Haze- Jimi Hendrix
"Purple haze... all in around.
dont know if i'm comin' up or down."

...and i'm bored.
bye.

i've been having a rather decent time today in office.
was watching the movie Green Street hooligans.
its rather nice.
its loosely based on West Ham's Inter City Firm.

just like they accurately summed up in the movie, west ham's got "shit football, awesome firm."

anyway, go watch it, its a great movie about friendship.
its free online anyway. just search.

anyway, this's to william.
cheer up dude.

You are a Scouser,
An ugly Scouser,
You're only happy,
On Giro day.
Your mum's out thieving,
Your dad's drug-dealing,
So please don't take my hubcaps away.